Why do some business people obtain all they want in negotiations, whilst others continue failing? Why do certain politicians have a successful negotiating voice, while others do not?
In response to the question “what makes a good negotiator”, the common response you read or hear will be: Act confident and be well-prepared, dress for success, talk clearly, ask and expect questions, request for a little more than what you want, toss out Powerpoint presentation slides, and be within the time-schedule.
Prosperous people are aware that advanced communication abilities are definitely the secret weapon to success in today’s world; moreover, they know how to perfect their negotiation skills.
Sadly, a negotiator driven by these principles is destined to fail.
An effective negotiator doesn’t use the rational method of cognition (intelligent part of the brain), and perhaps even the mathematical resources. It’s the old, primitive brain which happens to be involved here. The “primitive brain” has an effect on emotions and memories and is responsible for individual survival, and the initial filtering of all incoming messages. Any message stated, will first go to another person’s primitive part, then the midbrain, and finally the rational section of the brain, the neocortex that uses reasoning and analytical thinking to resolve complex problems.
When you’re preparing yourself to express something elaborate, the details will be stored in your neocortex in a structured manner. Here is the most common catch. You typically take it for granted that the information should be conveyed the way you have it stored. You do so, as it feels reasonable. But that’s not how it operates.
To negotiate productively and reach your audience more efficiently, you will need to make your message more “listenable”. Below are some important points that great negotiators normally follow closely:
Before attempting to convey your main goal message you need to ensure your audience is ready to accept it. This has to be imperative from the beginning of your message.
1) Establish positioning ahead of giving the main points. Nothing would ever convince individuals to follow someone with low status. We often respect people who are more expert than us in something. Deliver something pertinent that creates a sense of respect among the audience towards you. The overall game plan is to make yourself credible.
2) Begin by preparing a strategy that would help to pass the initial message filtering which takes place in the audience’s brains. To put it differently, first, you have to tackle the primitive brains of the listeners, make them feel that they are in a safe environment. This can be achieved by following these suggestions. First, start off the presentation with a humorous anecdote; good negotiators often structure the presentation with apt stories. Secondly, run the discussion in a peaceful place or in a nearby restaurant; lastly, show a desire for your audience’s needs and issues.
3) Maintain their attention on you. But what you should do to get their continuous attention? Picture yourself talking to a group, while they’re checking out their watches/the clock, seeing some other place or checking their phones. To get their continuous attention, you have to pay attention to 2 things: bring in curiosity and never give all the information at once. Originality and curiosity will get your audience’s attention very easily. Your message can get passed through their primitive brains and then make it to their neocortex, only when they recognize something totally new, which they have to discover gradually.